Divorce

Introducing divorce to my child

December 28, 2023
By Roba El-Gindy

Informing your child about a divorce is a difficult conversation but essential to ensure they feel secure and have a clear understanding of the situation.

Here are some detailed tips on how to inform your child about your divorce:

1. Plan what you want to sayTake time to plan what you want to say about the divorce to your child. Organize your thoughts and plan a clear and concise explanation.
2. Choose the right time and placeYou want to choose a time and place where the child feels safe and secure. Avoid telling them when they're already upset or distracted.
3. Be honest Be truthful when speaking to your child about the divorce. Answer any questions the child may have as openly and honestly as you can to avoid confusion or misunderstandings.
4. Use age-appropriate language Explain the situation in language that is appropriate for your child’s age and level of understanding. You don’t want to share too much information that may confuse or upset your child.
5. Reassure your child Let your child know that you love them and that they will always be loved by both parents. Reassure them that they will still see both parents, and that the divorce is not their fault.
6. Provide emotional supportYour child may be upset and have many questions. Be prepared to provide emotional support and respond to any concerns they may have. Listen and empathize with them.
7. Avoid blamingAvoid blaming one parent or the other for the divorce. It is important to keep the focus on the well-being of the child.
8. Keep the routineTry to maintain as much normalcy in your child’s routine as possible. Keeping routines will help them feel secure and provide a sense of consistency during a time of change.
9. Don't burden the child with adult issuesAvoid discussing adult issues or using your child as a confidant. This puts an unnecessary burden on the child, and it can be emotionally harmful.
10. Seek professional helpIn some cases, it may be helpful to involve a professional, such as a Parenting Coach or a Child Psychologist, to help you & your child navigate the difficult emotions related to divorce.